This sandwich will change your life.

#5 was complaining of a tummy ache this afternoon. He also had a boo-boo, but he wasn’t complaining about that, because he had this:

A bacon bandaid, sent to him by loyal reader and fan of #5, my friend Genny. As we all know, bacon makes everything better. It’s a logical choice for a bandaid. We have found the bacon bandaids to be more effective on boo-boos than kisses.

CC set him on the couch and brought him a glass of water and went back to making lunch.

That? Oh, that’s fifteen pounds of bacon. Minus lunch already in progress.

(If you’re lucky enough to live near an Original Pancake House, you may be interested to know that you can now buy their bacon by the case for four dollars per pound. Around here, that’s way cheap for bacon, and it’s damn tasty.)

#5: (yells from the couch) I smell bacon!

CC: You are correct. Would you like a piece?

#5: BACON!!!!

CC: What about your tummy ache?

#5: BACON!!!! BACON!!!!

CC: Have you eaten anything today?

#5: Um, no.

CC: Anything at all?

#5: No.

CC: Remember yesterday when I told you that you were going to starve to death playing video games because you wouldn’t stop to eat anything?

#5: Yes.

CC: That’s what’s happening right now.

#5: Oh.

CC: That’s why you have a tummy ache.

#5: Oh. (waits quietly for a minute) So. . . can I have some bacon?

CC’s plan was to make everyone BLT’s for lunch:

Isn’t it lovely? I saw a blurb on TV once about food photographers and all the creepy things they have to do to their food to make it photogenic. I think of that every time I see pretty food in advertising. It makes me want to take a shower. This here is undoctored bacon, folks.

CC asked #5 if he wanted a BLT.

#5: I don’t really like lettuce. I also don’t like tomatoes.

Of course you don’t.

I loves me a good BLT. But something else was speaking to my soul today:

Peanut Butter & Bacon. I make it a point to try to turn everyone that I meet on to the PB&B (unless they have a peanut allergy or don’t eat pork, in which case? More for me). Most people initially put up a lot of resistance. Those people are merely unenlightened, and as a PB&B disciple, it’s up to me to show them the path to true happiness and peace of mind.

CC: What about peanut butter and bacon?

#5: I don’t like peanut butter.

Me: Commie!

#5: (sticks tongue out at me)

CC: Stop that. Both of you. Here, eat your sandwich.

The #5 special

What do you say- PB&B: enlightenment or blasphemy? What’s your favorite way to eat bacon?


59 thoughts on “This sandwich will change your life.

  1. I AM lucky enough to live near an Original Pancake House, but I have not had bacon there. I usually order the Dutch Baby, which is like the biggest crepe you have ever had, with no filling, served with powdered sugar and lemon. It takes a long while to make. Also, sometimes I have Swedish pancakes. I’m very multicultural, see?
    BLTs are great. I’m not sure about the PB&B, but I would be willing to try it.

    1. The Dutch Baby is awesome, as are the Swedish Pancakes. You are very diverse in your tastes! I have a hard time making up my mind when I go there. Strangely, I have one near me and I’ve never been to it. It has become the place where CC can steal one kid away for a one-on-one breakfast with Dad. I’m sure it’s better for me that I don’t go there. I would eat a Dutch Baby for every meal.

  2. My #1, Ms Kotah is allergic to anything containing Lactose, Gluten, or Egg. She also has an intolerance to many colorings, flavorings and preservatives. My no #2 Master Cammy isn’t allergic to anything. Except Mosquitoes (as is no #1).

    This means we eat alot of fresh fruits, vegetables, salads, and mostly very fresh un preserved meats. For some reason, #1 does not have any reaction to the Bacon from the Deli @ Coles, or Woolworths.

    So…. to keep things interesting, in our house, a typical salad is made up of, lettuce, tomatoes, cucumber, apples, mandarins, oranges, green/crimson grapes (or both), celery,



    Warm, water fried bacon (not oil fried) chopped into pieces then drizzled all over the top and tossed through.


    1. Hey, your 1 sounds like me…is he/she ADHD? or with any residual effects of autism? Or, just a native of New Jersey (big numbers there) I have the casein/dairy intolerance, along with wheat/gluten…egg may be an issue (Fundamentally). But the diet you describe is my ideal… I made a huge organic garden this summer- the largest, most successful of the crop is lettuces. Fresh, green salads, all summer long. Organic, no pesticides – as, with all ADHD kids (and adults) pesticides are poisons. In insects, the pesticides harm them nuerologically, killing them in the long run, and this is what DDT and chems do to humans. And kids.

      1. Hi Spectra.. 🙂 Thanks for replying to my reply.. 😀

        I am very lucky, neither of my children have ADHD, or any diagnosed behavioural issues. This could be due to the fact that their diet is relatively healthy.

        #1 actually had to have formula drained out of her belly at a few hours old, and she was breast fed until 3.5 years of age. We knew relatively early we had to be very aware of her diet and reactions. We tried her on a small spoonful of spaghetti Bolognaise – and her eyes swelled shut. With egg – she gets blisters! After quite a few trips to the hospital, phenergan and steriods later, we finally have a fairly well worked out list of what’s okay, and not okay.

        I think I will make a real effort into getting a vegetable garden going, which will have the added benefit of being more cost effective as well as pesticide and chemical free.

    2. That sounds like a fab salad!! I love fruit on salads and am finding that the kids do too (except for #2, who hates all fruit). I’m afraid though if I put bacon on the salad, #5 will just eat around the salad part and eat only the bacon.

      1. Ahhhh…the sweet taste of a salad, grown in peace, now that my nutso, veggie-killing neighbor is gone…((sighs)) Peace at last!

        I did just fry up some bacon last night. But ate it plain. 6 pieces. Then turned around, and fried up 5 more pieces. Is 11 strips of bacon too much, home alone on a Saturday night? Just a box of wine and a package of bacon. Me. SIngle. Lovin’ it!

  3. The bacon bandaids are all kinds of awesome!

    I’ve never tried a PB&B but it sounds oddly tasty. My fav way to have bacon at the moment is bacon with hommous, cheddar cheese, red onion, egg, tomato and lettuce and a squirt of sweet chilli sauce (soooo gooood!).

  4. Where do I even start!? Bacon band-aids?? That is the best bacon merchandise I’ve ever seen (related note: last month I saw a bacon Gumby-like figure in the Poconos at a pig-themed breakfast joint and almost bought it for #5, but it wasn’t cool enough).

    I didn’t know that about the Original Pancake House – that’s awesome! I cannot believe I’ve never tried bacon and peanut butter together – two of my favorite things. Well three, if you count sandwiches in general. PB & Co. in NYC has The Elvis, and I’ve been trying to convince myself for 10 years that it would be okay to order it.

    1. The best part is that the tin of bandaids came labeled “free gift inside!”, which was a tiny pink plastic pig. I’ve been wanting to go to that restaurant since I heard about it, but haven’t been yet. You should just make your own Elvis at home!

  5. is there any bad way to enjoy bacon??? i think my fave way is straight up, followed closely by a blt, and third, bacon, egg and cheese breakfast taco!

    i can’t really wrap my mind around pb&b, but i might have to try it the next time i make some bacon.

  6. My son would kill for the bacon band-aid! Some mornings I’ll ask him what he ate for breakfast and he’ll say, “nine pieces of bacon”. I love PB and bacon sandwiches but haven’t had one in ages as I’d probably gain 10 pounds just looking at it.

    1. Yeah, it’s kind of a problem that there are 14 pounds of bacon in my fridge right now. Genny gave the website for the bacon bandaids; I think Archie McPhee has them too.

  7. A whey protein blueberry peach smoothie for breakfast just doesn’t compete with a BLT…or Julie’s PB&B!

    I found the bacon band-aids at the most awesome candy shop in the world: Smeeks on Camelback Road in Phoenix. They don’t yet have a shopping basket set up, but I suppose you could call them.

    Do I smell bacon??

  8. I think I could do the PB&B. I really think I could do it. It’s actually a good thing I live alone and never buy bacon, because if I did, it would be on everything. With cheese.

  9. Love, just love a BLT! As for a PB&B? I hate, hate peanut butter (but love satay, go figure).

    Bacon is a menu option in our house, but I can sneak ’em at other times!

    My favourite way to eat bacon is for breakfast – bacon, eggs, tomatoes and mushrooms on toast. YUMMO!

  10. Well thanks a lot stepmom! Now Jay wants a PB and bacon sandwich. If I told him you had 15 pounds of bacon in your frig he’d be on the next flight out. The crazy thing is, I might have to try that sandwich myself. To answer your question…well, I think you saw Jay’s latest favorite bacon concoction:

  11. I just bought a pound of bacon which was promptly used up for BLTs. My youngest doesn’t like BLT so he just had a PB&J. He does love bacon though, so maybe I should introduce him to the PB&B. Speaking of finding bacon in odd places, there is a restaurant here in LA (The Nickel Diner) that sells homemade donuts. One of the faves, but one which I can’t bring myself to try, is the Maple Glazed with Bacon Sprinkles. Tell that to #5!

  12. I will definitely have to try this PB&B. It has never occurred to me to combine the two, but they are two of the most versatile and delicious foods in the world, so I suppose it makes sense. I’ll check it out and report back here.

  13. We live in Canada. There are, to the best of my knowledge, no Original Pancake Houses anywhere around here. There are also no Cracker Barrel, no Denny’s, no Bob Evans, no I-Ho,p and no Olive Gardens.
    The worst of it is that we see all the TV ads from the USA.
    We also have no Kohl’s, no T.J. Max, and no Target yet — though they are coming — and that is just a few of the travesties we face.
    Many things can be ordered online, but we are unlikely to ever get free shipping, or even reasonably priced shipping, and we are taxed heavily on our purchases. To add insult to injury, our stuff is held up at the border and often searched.
    On the plus side, we do have universal healthcare, Tim Horton’s , and a heck of a lot of nice scenery, so I plan to stay here.
    It’s just that the restaurant/shopping situations get to me sometimes.
    There, that is my bitch of the day.

  14. I don’t like peanut butter very much, so I don’t think I’ll be trying the PB&B. I do love bacon and I like it with my waffles which makes it okay to dip it in the syrup. Pouring syrup on a plate with just bacon is kind of a fat girl move. 🙂

    Yesterday, I fried 1/2 lb. of bacon and then added fresh whole green beans, onion, salt, and garlic pepper. Fried it and then added some water to let the beans get melt-in-your-mouth soft. All vegetable dishes in the South have at least 1/2 lb. of meat in them. Yum-my.

  15. OMG! YES! I used to work at a bagel place and my favorite thing was chocolate chip bagels with bacon and peanut butter! So good, heart attack for sure, but so so so so delicious! All my friends make fun of me for it though 😦

  16. Love me some peanut butter and bacon. Don’t forget peanut butter and banana!

    I’ve even gotten to where I put peanut butter on my waffles before putting syrup on ’em.

      1. Hell YEAH… I love cinnamon sugar. I’ll put the peanut butter down, top it with a little honey THEN put the cinnamon sugar on it so it “sticks” better. haha…

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