Ever have one of those weeks where it seems you have all the time in the world to do everything you need to do, plus everything you want to do? A week where each day you wake up before the alarm even goes off and you’re full of energy? A week where absolutely nothing falls through the cracks?
Yeah, me neither.
And so sometimes I don’t post on schedule. Or with substance. I did have a pretty good yoga class this week though.
One of the places I practice yoga is in the city. I had to do a Google Earth search to get a picture of the front of the studio containing what I want to show you, because none of the published images show it.
“It” being the fact that that the yoga studio is on top of a “video” store. Actually, the studio is several floors above it. Frequently there are tour buses that park nearby. Sometimes I have the good fortune of arriving when a group of midwestern show choir kids have lined up to wait for their bus (and please do not misconstrue me; midwestern show choir kids are my people) and I get to wade through them as they are experiencing what appears to be their first viewing of such items as are on display in a “video” store window.
When that happens, it pretty much makes my whole day.
This yoga studio has excellent teachers. Some of them also make me laugh.
Here are some of the yoga zings I’ve heard lately (fill in your own accent, because each teacher has a different one, which I dearly love):
Teacher: There’s no reason to be afraid of bending backwards. Be afraid of hot dogs. And Ho-Ho’s.
Student: What’s a Ho-Ho?
Teacher: I was just asking myself that. What the hell do they put in there, anyway?
Teacher: Wait, where are you going, running man? You have to stay in the room all ninety minutes. You’re not leaving, no?
Student: I’m going to throw up.
Teacher: Oh yes, by all means. All vomiting should be done in the restroom.
The student returned from the restroom and finished the class, and ever after was referred to as vomiting man instead of running man.
Teacher: Just breathe. Don’t go to the crazy place, people.
Another admonition about backbends:
Teacher: Don’t be afraid of backbends, people. Be afraid of fried chicken. Be afraid of green jello that your mom makes and puts cat food in it instead of something else.
And finally, the dry erase board. I so wish I had a picture of the drawing they had done- a crocodile in bed with come-hither eyes. The caption read:
If you invite a crocodile into your bed, don’t be mad at the crocodile when it bites you in the ass. Namaste.
Have you heard any good one-liners lately? Gotten any good advice? How’s your week going?